Eye for an I.....

By now I'm sure many of you have heard about the manhunt for Christopher Jordan Dorner.  If not, here's a link to the story:

Rogue Cop - The Manhunt

*sigh*

I didn't really pay attention to the headlines at first.  I thought it was another "civilian" gone mad....but it got interesting enough for me to pay attention when I realized it was a cop who was on this actual killing rampage.  Why did that make it worthwhile to begin to follow?  Well, cops are suppose to be the good guys and a cop turning on cops....*shrug*....is interesting.  Now, I'm like, "WHAT made him snap"? So, I'm paying a little bit more attention to it.

I have read some of his manifesto.  It's pretty long....but here's the link if you want to read it.  Honestly, it's far too much for me to read and ain't nobody got time for that...but I think I got the jest of it.  

So.....what do I think?

Thanks Tupac.  I couldn't have said it better myself.

If you didn't watch the video, basically what he said was and I'm SO putting this into my own words:

"I asked nicely more than once, more than twice....I'm tired of asking...so now you're just gonna give me what I want....by any means necessary".

Horrible summation so you should probably hear him say it....plus.....the visual is much better.

Hate me if you will, but it's the truth.

I DO NOT - DO NOT - DO NOT condone what he's doing but....*thinking*  I guess I can see how and why he snapped.  Is it really a secret of how corrupt LAPD is?  If it is, where the hell have you been?

I've always heard about this "code" - basically that cops don't rat out other cops.  No matter what it is:  Drug abuse, drug trafficking, sexual exploitation, domestic violence....even murder.  So if anybody goes against the grain of that, they're cast out of the circle and blackballed, for life.  When good guys become the real bad guys, the real good guys become the bad guys for not being the good guys to protect the bad guys that want to look like good guys.  A little confusing but I'm sure you got it.....or you just didn't want to get it.  It's irony at it's finest.

So, Dorner's position of fighting for his name and honor - for doing what was "right" through all these years, fighting for the freedoms and protection of our country, only to be blackballed and unable to work because his name, his reputation, his legacy has been tarnished......*thinking*.....yeah, I could the desperation and frustration, the feeling of being slapped in the face. If he had children, they will suffer from this too....so yeah, this is a dark hole with no light.   I don't think he's going about it the right way....but who's going to listen to him.  Who's gonna give him the opportunity to live/leave this life with dignity?

Nobody.

Especially not now.  

He has nothing to lose.

Yeah, he could have gone away without this HORRIFIC situation at hand.  NOBODY should be dead right now....nobody!!  So please don't misconstrue my words to support his actions in any way.....EVER.  I think killing people to make a point is the DUMBEST thing that ANYBODY could ever do.  Beside, there's no point in me saying, he deserves to be punished so severely even it if means the death penalty because as far as he's concerned, he died a long time ago and I'm not foolish enough to think he's coming out of this alive...taken by his hand or theirs.

Let this be yet another reason why stiffer gun laws are necessary and let this be a reminder to the police officers who take an OATH to uphold the law, protect the people of each and every borough, ghetto, city, town, state, crack and/or crevice, that YOU are not above the law,  you're under it just like the rest of us....not everybody will or want to abuse their authority!

The real sad part about this story.....not even that innocent people have died......but that innocent people will die.  Innocent people will still be hurt, killed, mistreated by these kinds of cops and 9-11 calls will continued to be ignored or taken when "they're ready to respond".  The sad part is that bad cops will still unlawfully detain and exercise excessive force on detainees.  The sad part is that ALL of these allegations will be swept back under the rug....again.  This unfortunate situation will be just another blip on the radar of "unfortunate situations".

“Tempt not a desperate man.”

William Shakespeare

It's Friday!

Well hello beautiful people!

Yes, yes, yes!  We've made it to Friday and for that I am grateful.  It's pay day too.....

and the rents due.... 

hahahaha, yep..... that's pretty much what Friday's are like for me now.  Well, at least the first Friday of the month.  Looking back through the years, I noticed how "Friday" changed for me.

When I was a kid, I couldn't wait until Friday!! That meant I didn't have to get up early for school the next day.  I could possibly have friends sleepover or I could go sleepover at a friends house!!!  Friday's meant Saturday morning cartoons and my mom ALWAYS cooked a bomb ass breakfast on Saturday and Sunday. Yeeeeessss! Friday was the gateway to happiness!

Then in my "early twinkling twenties" I couldn't wait for Friday to come!  That meant I didn't have to get up early for work the next day...not that it mattered because I'd party  6 days a week and still go to work the next day. Fridays meant, I could possibly have a friend sleep over or sleep over at a friends (hehehehehe...)...Friday's meant taking the kids to my parents so I can go out and PARTTTTTTAY!  Friday's meant getting wasted and not worrying about trying to pull myself together because I could literally turn myself into a hermit crab and nurse my hangover.  And during this time...when I would move back to my parents....and didn't have rent... Friday's meant I was going SHOPPING!!! Woooo whoo!

Going into my late twenties - early 30's, Fridays meant....THANK GOD I don't have to come to work tomorrow to see these people anymore.  One more day of this bullshit and I'd be catching a case and ain't nobody got time for that.  Fridays meant the beginning of a weekend getaway to relax or it meant spending a day out with the kids so I can act juvenile enough to let out my stress.  Fridays meant that after work, I'd be finding me a good hard shot of some kind of alcohol, not to get drunk, but just to even out.....to unwind.... and friends don't spend the night much anymore....

Now at my age...Fridays mean I just need to get up out of bed before 10am because I have to get to the bank and post office before they close....so I can come back home and do everything that I didn't have time to do during the week - laundry, cleaning: bathrooms, kitchen, carpets, washing my hair....Payday Friday, only means my phone will ring less because I was able to stuff a bill in somebody's mouth about the services I'm using....cable, pg & e, smud...... RENT.  hahahaha...

So yeah...., Friday's don't quite feel the same anymore.

My eyes are bleeding!!! INCEPTION!

Happy Wednesday!!

So, I wanted to share with you all a bit of a dream I had.... last night.....or this morning.... I don't know....while I was sleep.

ANYWHO......

What I can remember, I was washing makeup off of my face and I believe there was a guy with me...and I think it was somebody that I like....*thinking*....I'm fuzzy on that but while I'm trying to recall what happened, I'm getting the feeling that there was somebody there with me that I didn't want to be embarrassed and I'm feeling "love" or "affection".....that fuzzy feeling when you're around somebody you like.....yeah, that's the feeling that I'm having right now.

So, why this person is around me while I'm cleaning my face, I have no idea.  Because 1.) my hygiene maintenance is sacred private time... and 2.)  If I'm with a person that I'm crushing on....ain't NO way I'm taking off my makeup! hahahahaha  so you know this was a dream. hahahahaha!   So anyway, I'm wiping my eyes and I guess my fingernail cut the inside of my eyelid.  Blood started to pour out from my eye...and I grabbed a towel and went to find somebody to help.  

I found my dad and although I don't remember seeing her....I know my mom was there....because I could feel her.  So he looked into my eye and he said, "let's go to the hospital".  My mom (yeah, I see her now)....says, "Let me look" and when I lifted my eyelid, blood spilled out, running down my face, dripping to the carpet.  

Well, that's about as much as I remember but when I got to work today, I decided to look up the symbolic meaning of "bleeding eyes".  I'm very much into dream interpretation so I found it to be very interesting that it said this: 

Bleeding Eyes (Via Dream Moods)
To dream that your eyes are bleeding symbolizes the sacrifices your have made and the difficulties you have endured. Alternatively, the dream signifies some very deep pain or internal conflict within your soul. Although you may not feel any physical pain, you are hurting inside. Perhaps you have been hiding the pain for so long that you forgot what pain feels like. There is some unrest or uneasiness within which needs to be addressed and resolved immediately.

And on Go To Horoscope - Dream Dictionary

When you dream about eyes, the dream may be telling you that you need to literally look within yourself for an important answer to a problem you may be having, or that the answer you seek may have been right before your eyes all along. Alternatively, dreaming about one eye usually means that you are being too one sided on a particular viewpoint, and maybe you should open yourself up to new perspectives. 

If you knew me and my journey..... you would know why I'm all like "WOW" right now.  You'd know why this all makes sense to me. My life has been of many sacrifices and within the last 10 years or so, I've lost people that I just didn't think would ever go away and when they did, I didn't know how I'd make it without them.  The lost of my father and my sister, left pain so deep there were moments that I just knew I'd snap.  The internal conflict is very familiar and personal.  There's some current family situations that do have my uneasy and I guess the message from the dream is to get them resolved....and NOW! I just don't know if I should say something... or just let it go....if I do say something...how do I say it.....it's just a lot.....*sigh*

I have always been pretty intuitive.....and I get messages a lot in my dreams. I noticed this "gift" when I was about 11, or 12.  My grandmother was killed in a train crash and that was the first time I EVER really dealt with death and dying.  So one night after she had been buried... I had a dream I went to visit her.  It felt soooo real.  Now mind you, this dream was over 25 years ago....and I remember it like I just had it last week!  The message she left with me, came to be......and when it did......I just cried....because she told me....in my dream.....it would happen.

I guess this is probably why I enjoyed the movie Inception so much. I know to some of you the concept of thinking was SO far out that it got confusing....and the only thing that I didn't "accept" was them being able to get into each others dreams.  But the general premise of how dreams work....I was so into it.

So, I think I better.....pay attention to this.... and act accordingly.

Have you ever had a dream.....that came true?